October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Domestic Violence is an issue that knows no racial, cultural, gender or socioeconomic boundaries. Chances are, we all know someone whose life has been effected by domestic violence. In October 1987, the first Domestic Violence Awareness Month was observed. That same year marks the initiation of the first national domestic violence toll-free hotline. The purpose of DVAM is to mourn those who have died as a result of domestic violence, celebrate survivors, and connect those working to end domestic violence.

Here are some statistics from the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence:

NATIONAL STATISTICS

  • Every 9 seconds in the US, a woman is assaulted or beaten
  • On average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States. During one year, this equates to more than 10 million women and men
  • 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have been victims of [some form of] physical violence by an intimate partner within their lifetime
  • 1 in 5 women and 1 in 7 men have been victims of severe physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime
  • 1 in 7 women and 1 in 18 men have been stalked by an intimate partner during their lifetime to the point in which they felt very fearful or believed that they or someone close to them would be harmed or killed
  • On a typical day, there are more than 20,000 phone calls placed to domestic violence hotlines nationwide
  • The presence of a gun in a domestic violence situation increases the risk of homicide by 500%.
  • Intimate partner violence accounts for 15% of all violent crime
  • Women between the ages of 18-24 are most commonly abused by an intimate partner
  • 19% of domestic violence involves a weapon
  • Domestic victimization is correlated with a higher rate of depression and suicidal behavior
  • Only 34% of people who are injured by intimate partners receive medical care for their injuries

RAPE

  • 1 in 5 women and 1 in 71 men in the United States has been raped in their lifetime
  • Almost half of female (46.7%) and male (44.9%) victims of rape in the United States were raped by an acquaintance.
  • Of these, 45.4% of female rape victims and 29% of male rape victims were raped by an intimate partner

STALKING

19.3 million women and 5.1 million men in the United States have been stalked in their lifetime.1 60.8% of female stalking victims and 43.5% men reported being stalked by a current or former intimate partner

HOMICIDE

A study of intimate partner homicides found that 20% of victims were not the intimate partners themselves, but family members, friends, neighbors, persons who intervened, law enforcement responders, or bystanders
72% of all murder-suicides involve an intimate partner; 94% of the victims of these murder suicides are female

CHILDREN AND DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

1 in 15 children are exposed to intimate partner violence each year, and 90% of these children are eyewitnesses to this violence

ECONOMIC IMPACT

  • Victims of intimate partner violence lose a total of 8.0 million days of paid work each year
  • The cost of intimate partner violence exceeds $8.3 billion per year
  • Between 21-60% of victims of intimate partner violence lose their jobs due to reasons stemming from the abuse
  • Between 2003 and 2008, 142 women were murdered in their workplace by their abuser, 78% of women killed in the workplace during this timeframe

PHYSICAL/MENTAL IMPACT

Women abused by their intimate partners are more vulnerable to contracting HIV or other STI’s due to forced intercourse or prolonged exposure to stress

Studies suggest that there is a relationship between intimate partner violence and depression and suicidal behavior.7
Physical, mental, and sexual and reproductive health effects have been linked with intimate partner violence including adolescent pregnancy, unintended pregnancy in general, miscarriage, stillbirth, intrauterine hemorrhage, nutritional deficiency, abdominal pain and other gastrointestinal problems, neurological disorders, chronic pain, disability, anxiety and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), as well as noncommunicable diseases such as hypertension, cancer and cardiovascular diseases. Victims of domestic violence are also at higher risk for developing addictions to alcohol, tobacco, or drugs.

If you or someone you know needs help, please reach out to one of our excellent local resources:

Penelope House (Mobile County)
www.penelopehouse.org
24 Hour Crisis Hotline: 251-342-8994

The Lighthouse (Baldwin County)
www.abeacon.org
24 Crisis Hotline: 251-947-6008 or 800-650-6522

Penelope House has a number of events scheduled for DVAM. Coming up on October 26th, if you dine at Five Guys Burgers on Airport Boulevard, a portion of all sales will be donated to Penelope House. See their website for more information on events.

Social Media Do’s and Don’ts

Social Media Do’s and Don’ts

In the world today there are countless means of communication with others. Thanks to social media websites the world is more connected than ever. Websites such as Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, LinkedIn, Snapchat and more we are able to reconnect with your first love, childhood best friend, or college buddy. Unfortunately, with social media websites people can discover information you did not want them to.

If you are in the process of a divorce, child custody, and/or support case you should be cautious when using social media. You should think of social media activity as both public and permanent. If used properly social media can be entertaining and innocent but, if it is not used correctly it can be damaging to your case.

Here are some helpful tips to think about when using social media while going through a divorce, child custody, and/or support case.

1. DO NOT post pictures or comments revealing a wild, or out of control party lifestyle.

2. DO NOT post negatively about your Ex, your Ex’s family, your Ex’s attorney, or the Judge. Negativity will get you nowhere.

3. DO NOT post pictures of lavish vacations, fancy cars, new motorcycles, or luxury items (especially if child support is an issue).

4. DO NOT post status about your new boyfriend/girlfriend, particularly when your divorce is not finalized.

5. DO NOT post a profile on a dating website.

6. DO be selective about the information you share. Remember to think twice about what you post, even the smallest comments can be used against you in a divorce or custody/support case.

7. DO try and be positive, yet realistic. Posting negative, pessimistic, discouraging things about yourself can only hurt your case in the long run.

8. DO pay close attention to the photos your friends are posting of you or tagging you in. Your page is not the only one that could be monitored.

Divorce and the Family Business

Divorce and the Family Business

Divorce and the Family Business: What happens to the Family Business when you get divorced?

The business you and your spouse co-founded and run together is thriving. Your marriage? That’s another matter. Many people put off filing in situations like this because they fear that it will soon mean the end of the company. It does not have to be that way, especially if your lawyer is sensitive to the fact that the two still need to cooperate and that it will take a quite careful approach in figuring out severing some financial ties, but also having to keep the business alive.

A Census Bureau estimate from 2007 found that nearly 4 million businesses in the U.S. are operated by husband and wife. With a 50% divorce rate, divorce clearly affects a lot of small businesses. Overall, there is no question that it can be a very difficult situation involving two people. Though it may initially seem like a battle, it can work if you work together. Research says that it all depends on the individual couple, but also how the company runs and the skills of your divorce attorneys.

Some things to keep in mind:

Respect each other- this can be hard, especially if the reasons for the split were particularly painful. In some cases, if there isn’t any trust left between the two then there isn’t any respect, and it is probably be best to cut off communication.

Know when to get help- Unlike a lot of separated couples, the ones that operate a business together have to see each other a lot, even after the divorce is finalized.

Create agreement-This is a very important legal step that many couples haven’t though out when they found the business together. The agreement explains what will occur in the event someone wants to sell.

Sit down and discuss the situation with your employees- They will know what is happening, and what you don’t want to happen is for them to choose whose side to be on. Choosing sides can always slow the process down so its always in each party’s best interest to try to get along.

Signs of Opiate Addiction in a Loved One

Signs of Opiate Addiction in a Loved One

Opiate addiction is an increasing problem in the United States. For various reasons, a staggering 2.1 million Americans abuse opiates. It is no secret that people are constantly looking for solutions to their daily problems, but why turn to a substance that could lead to physical dependence and addiction?

Opiates are commonly prescribed for pain management following surgery or an injury. Some people start using simply for recreation or an occasional activity, but then it becomes a necessary part of an addict’s day. For them, seeking out the drug becomes a priority and all other responsibilities or obligations become secondary to the addiction. Many variables can contribute to the start of an opiate addition such as a genetic predisposition or environmental factors, but addiction knows no boundaries.

Warning signs include:

  • On and off relationships with unknown people
  • Stealing money or prescription medication from family or loved ones
  • Unusual injuries or bruising
  • Having multiple physicians and/or pharmacies
  • Decreased investment in personal hygiene and appearance
  • Showing up late or not at all with little to no explanation
  • Displaying an uncharacteristic lack of respect for others
  • Unaccounted for spending of income
  • Liquidating assets
  • Lashing out at family members or loved ones
  • Frequent agitation typically occurs when the addict cannot easily obtain the drug or when they have been without for any period of time.
  • Lack of compromise
  • “Me against the world” or “my way or the highway” attitudes

If you notice any of the above warning signs – trust your gut. It is not unusual for loved ones to make excuses for the mentioned behaviors. We would rather place the blame somewhere else as opposed to facing the reality of addiction. It is important to be supportive, but stay firm to not enable the addict. The addict must be active in his or her own well-being and care. Fostering a codependent relationship with the addict is not beneficial to either party.

When the person stops taking the drugs, the body needs time to recover, and withdrawal symptoms result. Opiate withdrawal refers to the wide range of symptoms that occur after stopping or dramatically reducing opiate drugs after heavy and prolonged use. Typically, this occurs after the person has been using the drug for several weeks or more. Since the time it takes to become physically dependent varies with each individual some people start to have symptoms of withdrawal without realizing what is happening to them. See common symptoms below.

Early symptoms of withdrawal include:

  • Agitation
  • Muscle aches
  • Eyes tearing up
  • Anxiety
  • Restlessness
  • Inability to sleep
  • Runny nose
  • Excessive sweating
  • Yawning often

Late symptoms of withdrawal include:

  • Elevated blood pressure
  • Rapid heartbeat
  • Abdominal cramping
  • Diarrhea
  • Dilated pupils and blurry vision
  • Goose bumps
  • Nausea and vomiting

As you can see the symptoms of withdrawal are unpleasant and uncomfortable, but they are part of a necessary process to break addiction. Although very unpleasant and painful, symptoms usually begin to improve within 72 hours, and within a week the individual should start to feel regular again. Utilizing a medical professional when using or withdrawing from opiates is highly recommended.

Unfortunately, opiate abuse is more common than we think or we want to admit. It is critically important to know the facts and be aware of warning signs. Don’t forget to be supportive of the addict, stay firm and do not enable them to continue using drugs.