4 steps to better managing your stress during divorce

4 steps to better managing your stress during divorce

4 steps to better managing your stress during divorce

Top 4 Tips for Managing Stress During Divorce

Stress is a serious factor in modern life. Stress is particularly prevalent during a divorce, which is said to be the most stressful and traumatic event that anyone can experience, second only to the death of a loved one. Stress can harm your immune system, cause weight gain, and even interfere with your cognitive functioning.

Some tips for managing stress:

  • Exercise has tremendous physical, mental and emotional benefits which cannot be overstated. Yoga is particularly effective in helping cope with stress, as numerous studies have shown that yoga can decrease depression, reduce the levels of the cortisol (stress) hormone in your body and increase gray matter in your brain.
  • Sleep is key to stress management. Losing even one hour of sleep each night can cause mental and physical impairment, which means you cannot make good decisions during this tough time in your life. Practice good sleep hygiene by making sure you have a dark and cool room, avoid electronics before bed and sleep and wake around the same time every day.
  • Maintain a balanced diet, rich in fruits and vegetables, unprocessed whole grains and high-quality proteins. Certain vitamins and minerals are essential to regulating the levels of cortisol and adrenalin in the body.
  • Avoid potentially harmful habits in dealing with stress. Remember that what we use to make us feel better should not make us feel worse. That means, when you are stressed, do not turn to a bottle of wine, a bag of chips or a pint of ice cream. Engage in a healthy activity instead, like taking a walk, meditating, or practicing a relaxing hobby that you enjoy.
4 Tips for Communicating with a High Conflict Person

4 Tips for Communicating with a High Conflict Person

4 Tips for Communicating with a High Conflict Person

First of all, what is a high conflict person (HCP)? This term often refers to individuals who have diagnosable personality disorders, but divorce and custody litigation are times of high stress that can lead even healthy individuals to be on their worst behavior. HCP is characterized by a pattern of behaviors that serve to increase conflict rather than resolve it. Examples of these behaviors are:

  • All or nothing thinking
  • Unmanaged emotions
  • Extreme behaviors
  • Blaming others

(Source: Billy Eddy, LSCW, JD, www.highconflictinstitute.com)

As a family law attorney with Herlihy Family Law, I frequently have clients who are struggling to communicate with a high conflict person. Some tips I give my clients are:

  1. Don’t try to convince them they are wrong or are being unfair.

    Logic does not work with someone who is embroiled in irrational thinking.

  2. Abandon the goal of “winning” an argument with them.

    HCPs like to argue so continuing to fight will only ensure that you remain trapped in a power struggle with them.

  3. Focus on the ultimate goal.

    If your goal is to coach Susie’s soccer team and they bring up that time you did something they did not like ten years ago, do not respond. Instead, re-direct the conversation back to the topic at hand.

  4. Keep your communication professional.

    Remember, your romantic relationship with this person is over, so it is not helpful to you to approach them on those terms. Remain calm and business-like. If necessary, restrict your communication with the HCP to written-only methods, such as email.

What is a Guardian Ad Litem?

What is a Guardian Ad Litem?

When it comes to divorce, child custody and visitation disputes are no picnic. These events can be a very emotional and intense process. Frequently in divorce, child custody, or visitation disputes a Guardian Ad Litem, also known as a GAL, will be appointed.

In Alabama, a GAL is an attorney appointed by the court to represent the “best interests” of the child or children involved. A GAL’s duty is not necessarily to advocate for what the child wants which can sometimes be opposed to what is in the child’s best interests. The Guardian Ad Litem will often be asked to present a report and recommendation to the Court for consideration at the conclusion of the case, and, while the Court will take into consideration the recommendation of the GAL, the Court is not bound by what the GAL recommends.

A Guardian Ad Litem is not only appointed in divorce and custody cases but might also be appointed in cases such as;
• Minors involved without living parents
• Juvenile Delinquency Cases
• Child Abuse and Neglect cases
• Guardianships, Conservatorships and Decedents’ Estates in Probate Court.
• Civil Suits of all kinds where minors are involved.

How to file for divorce

How to file for divorce

How to file for divorce

Wondering how to file for divorce? The divorce process can be confusing and complex if you haven’t divorced before. It is important you hire an experienced divorce attorney to represent you and help you navigate the process.

At Herlihy Family Law, we have over 12 years of experience and helped thousands successfully file for divorce. Watch the video below to learn more about where you can begin.

Divorce Where Do I Begin?