by Oyster Shell | Aug 1, 2016 | Alabama, Divorce, Family, Family Law, Mobile, Significant Decisions
Divorce brings with it many negative emotions. Many of these emotions usually cause stress that will interfere in our ability to function from day to day. Research says that the biggest favor you can do yourself is to learn how to relax. You just need to let go of the stress and let everything fall into place. Focus more on keeping yourself active, healthy and moving forward instead of staying stuck. Below are 5 tips that will help deal with divorce stress.
Top 5 Tips for Dealing with Divorce Stress
1. Make sure you pay attention to your personal needs
It’s always best to find a group, close friend or someone that you can talk to about everyday problems. It’s healthy to be able to do that and let go of certain negative feelings.
2.Keep yourself physically fit
Being active is a good way to reduce stress. Whether its yoga, spin class, boxing, any type of exercise will help reduce stress and let out built up anger. It will also though make you feel better about yourself anyways.
3. Make time for some fun
Regarding any situation that someone is in, there should always be time for fun. Going out with friends, family, whoever will always make you happy. Everyone deserves to have fun and let go of what has held them back enjoying life.
4.Change any expectations you have
Let go of what you feel the outcome should be and learn to accept what could possibly happen. Overall just let go of feeling like you can control every aspect of the situation.
Take the time needed to heal from the divorce and all feelings that are still around. Its important to take that time to heal so when you are ready to move on everything is behind and you are ready to start that new journey in your life.
by Oyster Shell | Jul 31, 2016 | Alabama, Division of Assets, Divorce, Family, Family Law, Finances, Mobile, Mortgage, Significant Decisions, Uncategorized
As we all know, one of the biggest issues in a divorce is the family home. It all starts to get messy when the decisions of what will happen to it and who is going to live in it become a concern for the parties. Typically, parties go from having two incomes to contribute to the mortgage and other household expenses during the marriage to having only one income to contribute to those expenses after the divorce.
Below are important questions people need to ask themselves when they aren’t sure if they should keep their home when going through a divorce.
1.Is your marital home a great fit for your new lifestyle?
2.What is your house worth today?
3.What would be the cost to keep the house up?
4.Are you willing to sacrifice financially in other areas to keep the house?
5.Is there any equity in the house or are we “upside down?”
6.If there is equity, can I afford to buy my spouse out?
7.Do I have the income and credit to refinance if the Court so orders?
8.Would it benefit me/us more financially to sell the house?
Having to choose whether or not to keep your residence could possibly be one of the most difficult decisions you will have to make during divorce, as there are likely many good and bad memories associated with your marital home. Its always wise to give yourself time to think it all through very carefully. Everyone needs to be able to manage their assets and develop a plan for financial stability and security in the future.
by Oyster Shell | Jul 14, 2016 | Divorce, Family, Legal Advice, Mobile, Significant Decisions
A Prenuptial Agreement is a contract executed between parties prior to their marriage concerning the division of assets, debts and possibly spousal support in the event of divorce. Almost anything can be included in a prenuptial agreement, except matters of child support, child custody and visitation.
Many people think of prenuptial agreements as the province of celebrity marriages, and that they are designed to award million dollar settlements in short term marriages. This is not the case. As more and more Americans are marrying later and later in life, many of us have our own assets when we get married, such as owning your own home and retirement or other investments, and you want to make sure your assets are protected. Prenuptial agreements have negative connotation for many people, but it is actually smart financial planning, just like having a will or a retirement savings strategy.
The simplest form of prenuptial agreement can simply state that each spouse retains ownership in anything they owned prior to the marriage and any items acquired subsequent to the marriage in that spouse’s individual name. In that scenario, the couple would have to intentionally title any assets in joint names for them to be considered “marital” property. In a country where many marriages end in divorce, a prenuptial agreement can help take financial incentives out of the decision-making process if your marriage hits a rocky patch because the financial decisions have already been made.
For a prenuptial agreement to be valid in the state of Alabama, both parties must have independent legal counsel to advise them of their rights and interests. If you are planning your marriage and are considering a prenuptial agreement, please contact us for a consultation.
by Oyster Shell | Jul 5, 2016 | Alabama, Divorce, Family Law, Legal Advice, Mobile, Significant Decisions, Uncategorized
As a divorce lawyer, you are always hearing new scenarios that have led to the breakdown of a marriage, but, more often than not, you hear variations on the same theme. When a spouse is cheating, there are some common warning signs that indicate infidelity.
1. Altering their schedule
If your spouse is suddenly working late every day or on weekends, when they have never had to in the past, that is typically a sign that something is amiss. Other common excuses to deviate from their former routine often include a sudden interest in going to the gym, attending church, or participating in other activities without you when these things did not interest them before. Often, these are excuses to be away from the home and you and with someone else.
2. Changes in sexual habits
If your spouse is refusing to be intimate with you without explanation, chances are they are having their needs met somewhere else.
3. Sudden focus on their own physical appearance
Drastic changes in hairstyle, buying sexy clothing or lingerie, obsessing over working out or losing weight can all be signals of infidelity.
4. Excessive Internet Use
From Facebook, to EHarmony, to Christian Mingle, the Internet is one of the top places to meet someone new or reconnect with an old flame. If your spouse is suddenly fixated on the Internet and secretive about their use, they are probably cheating.
5. Multiple Cellphones
If you have a family plan, then why does your spouse also have a prepaid cellphone? If your spouse has purchased a Go Phone in addition to their regular phone, then they are having an affair, unless they have a side business as a drug dealer.
6. Spending a lot of Time with Another Person
There are a million excuses for this one – she is an old friend from high school, her husband is deployed and she needs a lot of help around the house, she is a single mom and I feel sorry for her, his wife died and he needs help picking out a tie etc. If your spouse if performing “husbandly” or “wifely” tasks for someone else, there is probably more going on than they say. If your husband is mowing another woman’s lawn, beware.
The above is for educational purposes only. If you need legal advice, contact an attorney ASAP.
by Oyster Shell | Jul 2, 2016 | Alabama, Child Support, Children, Custody, Division of Assets, Divorce, Family, Family Law, Mobile, Significant Decisions, Visitation
Alison Baxter Herlihy is now a registered mediator. She recently completed a forty hour training on Domestic and Family Mediation and is now a Registered Domestic Relations Mediator on the State Court Mediator Roster maintained by the Alabama Center for Dispute Resolution.
The Alabama Supreme Court currently has a grant program and is working in conjunction with the Alabama Center for Dispute Resolution to pay for the services of a registered mediator in cases involving minor children where the total family income is less than $85,000.00 per year. At this time, Alison is the only registered domestic relations mediator in Mobile County, Alabama.
Alison is very much looking forward to wrapping up her first ten years of law practice and adding the service of mediation as decade number two commences. Resolution of complex changes beings here!
Please take a look at Alison’s profile with the Alabama Center for Dispute Resolution for more information. Here is a link to their site:
http://alabamaadr.org/web/roster-mediators/index.php?ID=1689&action=Profile
by Oyster Shell | Mar 7, 2016 | Children, Family Law, Significant Decisions
In a very short and succinct opinion issued today, the United States Supreme Court reverses the Alabama Supreme Court in V.L. vs. E.L.
The facts of this case involve a same-sex couple who previously resided in Georgia before relocating to Alabama. While in Georgia, V.L. legally adopted the biological child of E.L. The couple separated while living in Alabama, and the Alabama Court held that Alabama did not have to honor the adoption decree entered in Georgia, leaving V.L. with no legal rights whatsoever to the child she adopted. The United States Supreme Court held that the Full Faith and Credit Clause of the United States Constitution requires the Alabama Courts to uphold and enforce the Georgia adoption decree.
The full opinion can be read here: http://www.supremecourt.gov/opinions/15pdf/15-648_d18e.pdf
